• Wednesday, October 3 9:59 p.m. After a man put gasoline in his diesel-powered vehicle in Valley West, he had an extra-special parking lot tantrum, kicking and yelling and his misfueled chariot until the tow truck came.
• Thursday, October 4 1:19 a.m. A man called 911 from Room 219 at a lowlife-infested Valley West motel, asking for the motel’s phone number. It was given, though he admitted that he knew calling 911 for non-emergencies is a misdemeanor. He then rephoned the APD business line, making odd comments and suggesting that police “check him out.” He said he was transferring to HSU from Las Vegas, and made several nonsensical comments about his hometown. Soon he was calling 911 again, saying that he was actually transferring from West Texas and asking for an ashtray. Told that he had called the police, and not motel management, he quipped that he “only had four beers in his system.” He then called back to notify authorities that he was going to sleep and didn’t wish for any police contact. That might have concluded the saga, except that the motel manager then called police to relate complaints other lodgers had made about the garrulous guest, including his attempting to look up women’s skirts. An officer related the motel’s “final warning to the man,” and recommended that he calm down, shut his door and turn off the lights.
11:13 a.m. If you need to leave your backpack and flute in your parked car on Janes Road, go that extra inch and push the door-lock button down to avert later conversations with police.
2:44 p.m. A delusional woman who lives in her car showed up at the police station with an eclectic range of concerns. She said she had been “exposed” to a lethal dose of heroin, that people were somehow eavesdropping on her conversation with police and that these people were trying to kill her. Various celebrities were also following her, and, she said, she was related to John Gotti and other Mafia drug lords. She wanted to further confer with Napa Police and an “FBI detective” to get her son back.
3:53 p.m. A representative of an F Street cooperative supermarket came to the station with a box of found property. Items included a white shirt, a black tote bag, a brown paper bag containing a new toilet seat cover and a dish, more clothing, a book, necklace, glasses, a key, a coffee mug and a tin box full of quarters.
5:09 p.m. A woman with an unleashed dog on H Street wasn’t doing the image of aggressive panhandlers any favors. When a man in a store told the woman he wouldn’t give her any money, she helpfully notified him that, “You could step out and I’ll shank you.” Police found and arrested her at 10th and H streets, and took her poor dog to the shelter.
6:21 p.m. A suspected shoplifter at a 13th Street marketplace was visiting from the Czech Republic, cooperated and paid for his items.
• Friday, October 5 12:56 a.m. A woman went to the hospital with after something known only as “Jim” pushed her down and made her hit her head on a heating radiator.
11:31 a.m. A homeless woman who had arrived in town the day before said she suspected that she had been raped while camping in the redwoods with people she just met. She said she woke up with all her clothes off and didn’t remember anything else. As an officer picked her up at the station, the Sexual Assault Response Team and Rape Crisis personnel were summoned. An officer then interviewed a suspect with a green hat and blue backpack on the Plaza.
8:28 p.m. A pack of drunken young neighborhood toughs bedeviled a resident in the area of Chestnut Place and Stewart Avenue. They often gather at an Alliance Road retaining wall to marshall their semi-feral forces for nighttime misadventures to follow.
8:36 p.m. A thin, shaven-headed, drugged-looking man roamed Cedar Drive, knocking on doors and asking one resident if he knew how to patch a tire on his bike.
• Saturday, October 6 4:01 a.m. A man in a 1900 block of H Street apartment chose this wee hour to go rather loudly berserk. First he “blasted” music with his sliding glass door open, which didn’t mask the bellowing of his argument with himself. When a neighbor went to his door and asked him to quiet down, things went about as well as you’d expect, which was not at all (especially if you factor in the death threat). According to the neighbor, the man strode forth from his thundering domicile without benefit of shoes or shirt, brandishing a butcher knife, pointing it at himself and making nonsensical statements. When police got to him, he was fully unable to care for himself and was committed to a mental health institution.
11:55 a.m. A nice guitar was stolen from a man’s car, either at his H Street apartment building or the HSU Library lot. It was a dark brown, all-wood Roland GR 303.
12:36 p.m. In roughly the same area – the 1900 block of G Street – someone came in through a kitchen window and stole a $1,000 MacBook Pro.
12:39 a.m. Back over to the 1800 block of G Street, where someone attempted to break in to an apartment, but succeeded only in breaking the window.
• Sunday, October 7 1:05 a.m. A drunken ex-boyfriend made a full-court press to get into a 14th Street woman’s apartment, banging on the front door, ringing the doorbell and refusing to leave. Her calling him on his cell phone did nothing to stave him off, and he kept going from the front door to the back door, looking for a way in. An officer arrested him on a warrant.
4:08 a.m. A man in a red hoodie outside the donut shop screamed for police, demanding that police take him to jail to get him off his sore feet because it was cold.
5:03 p.m. More peculiar drama on lower H Street as a woman was reported “comatose.” Medical personnel escorted her from the property.
5:20 p.m. The lord of the lower H Street manor called APD, complaining that “aggressive police officers were making things worse” by “telling everyone to sit down and shut up.” The caller asked the dispatcher to “call off the dogs.”
5:25 p.m. The H Streeter called 911 again, asking the dispatcher to advise officers on scene that his sister was in the ambulance.
6:45 p.m. A drill set, subwoofer and amp vanished from an unlocked car on Maple Lane.
• Monday, October 8 10:10 a.m. A brush fire at Foster Avenue and Q Street led authorities to a series of traveler encampments, only one occupied. Trash scattered about the area appeared to be the remnants of a drugmaking operation. The lone soul found amid the debris and desolation was given names of service providers and night shelter info.
1:07 p.m. A long-haired man was reported “flinging meth” on the Plaza. Police made a narcotics arrest.
3:12 p.m. A 19th Street resident complained that her landlord was going to place a “For Sale” sign on her front lawn. She read on the Internet that police are required to help her, but was told that it was a civil matter.
7:07 p.m. A Janes Road mobile home park resident reported that neighbors had been finding large piles of feces in their yards for the past several nights. The previous night at 2 a.m., another tenant heard noises outside and observed a large “creature” standing upright. The resident went to get a firearm, and saw the creature striding away down the street, still upright.